[Susan Foreman]

Our pub is about 10 miles away from the Castle Donington racetrack - home of the Download Festival

I was working Friday evening. It was quite busy. Mostly regulars, but a few 'new faces'

I was happily listening to Planet Rock on the radio

Cue disgruntled noises from a certain regular, who almost always gets drunk during a session, and who worships Michael Buble!

Michelle: This music is s**t, Sue. Can't you put something good on?
Me: My shift, my pub, my music. This is what I want to listen to
Michelle: Even classical music is better than this
Me: These songs are classics. 'Smoke on the water', 'Whole lotta Rosie', 'Don't fear the reaper', 'Freebird'. You don't get more classic than that
Michelle: I want to hear some cheesy pop
Me: These songs are cheesy pop. 'Detroit rock city', 'Living on a prayer', 'Lets get rocked'. They don't get cheesier than that

She then made the mistake of turning to a table filled with respectable-looking business men and women

Michelle: Oi. Don't you think this music is s**t? Wouldn't you rather hear something better?
Respectable businesswoman: Actually, we are going to see Iron Maiden tomorrow. Yes, what is being played is s**t. I want to hear something louder and heavier!
Michelle: I'm going out for a fag!