Doctor Who over the years: Episode quotes
Robot Of Sherwood
The Doctor: No damsels in distress, no pretty castles, no such thing as Robin Hood.
(An arrow slams into the Tardis next to him. A figure in dressed in Lincoln Green pops up from behind a tree trunk on the other side of the stream.) Robin: You called?
(and winks.) Very, very nicely done with the box, sir. I saw a Turk perform something very similar at Nottingham Fayre.
(The Doctor pulls the arrow out, and the hole vanishes.) It's a trick with mirrors, no doubt?
The Doctor: A trick?
Robin: A good jest. Ha, ha!
The Doctor: This is not a trick. This is a Tardis.
Robin: Whatever it is, you bony rascal, I'm afraid I must relieve you of it.
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The Doctor: That is not Robin Hood.
Robin: Well then, who, sir, is about to relieve you of your magic box?
(Robin draws his long sword. The Doctor walks onto the bridge.) The Doctor: Nobody, sir. Not in this universe or the next.
Robin: Well then, draw your sword and prove your words.
The Doctor: I have no sword. I don't need a sword.
(The Doctor opens his coat and turns to prove it.) Because I am the Doctor.
(He dons a gauntlet.) And this is my spoon. En garde!
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The Doctor: That was bantering. I am totally against bantering.
Clara: How can you be so sure he is not the real thing?
The Doctor: Because he can't be.
Clara: When did you stop believing in everything?
The Doctor: When did you start believing in impossible heroes?
Clara: Don't you know?
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Robin: You're clearly more advanced in years and you have a sickly aspect to you.
The Doctor: I have a what?
Robin: You're as pale as milk. It's the way with Scots. They're strangers to vegetables.
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Sheriff: Shortly, I shall be the most powerful man in the realm. King in all but name, for Nottingham is not enough.
Clara: It isn't?
Sheriff: After this, Derby.
Clara: Right.
Sheriff: Then Lincoln. And after Lincoln
Clara: Worksop?
(The Sheriff stabs his dagger into the table.) Sheriff: The world!
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The Doctor: I'm not a hero.
Robin: Well, neither am I. But if we both keep pretending to be. Ha-ha! Perhaps others will be heroes in our name. Perhaps we will both be stories. And may those stories never end.