HELLRAISER – I know people groan when they hear about their sacred cows being massacred by someone with a bigger budget and plans for a revival, but still I went in with an open mind – after all, it’s not like the original doesn’t have its flaws. The thing about ‘Hellraiser 2022’ is that it’s a good, solid stab at genre filmmaking, but no more. In such a crowded landscape, how can that stand out? Like fellow contender ‘Candyman’, ‘Hellraiser 2022’ is a ‘reconfiguration’ rather than a remake. That it’s about a recovering addict and her co-dependent relationships might drag it closer to ‘the now’, but somehow it’s more conventional than the original – here the goodies are centre stage, whereas Kirsty from the first film was more like a tepid Cinderella type who muddled through in the shadow of Clare Higgins’ murderous rage, someone on the sidelines who just happened to make good when all the interesting stuff was happening somewhere else. The villainy here is pat, digestible, and the form it takes, a crap uber-narcissist called Voigt, is as dismissible as he is despicable; he may plan to use Pinhead’s box of tricks to shit on humanity, but he’s a little difficult to take seriously with that occult kitchen unit sticking out of his stomach. I’m being a bit harsh, perhaps. ‘Hellraiser 2022’ was always bound to raise unrealistic expectations. But you’d feel conned in the absence of just something a little bit special, even a twinge of the original’s delight in sheer wickedness and grand guignol. The positives – an atmospheric latter third, general watchability, good monsters (unlike the rest of the planet I like the new Cenobites) must be weighed against the brutal truth that this film is more reminiscent of a good, more expensive ‘Hellraiser’ sequel rather than a visionary re-fashioning.
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