Fav Movie Quotes

[Paul Zombie]

funny line from Sondra locke in Sudden impact, always makes me laugh

Jennifer Spencer: Need a lift?

Young Guy: Why, yes ma'am.

Jennifer Spencer: Good. Then shove a jack up your ass!

[drives off]

[Inspector Abberline]

Selina Meyer: Okay, so they want me to go to a pig roast to meet a bunch of men who probably took turns to f**k the pig before they roasted it?

Amy Brookheimer: I wouldn't presume they took turns.

Selina Meyer: I'm the Vice President of the United States, you stupid little f***ers! These people should be begging me! That door should be half its height so that people can only approach me in my office on their goddamn, motherf***ing knees!

Selina Meyer : Maybe I should just say, "Get the government out of my f***in' snatch,you know?

[Demoncrat]

I needs to see more of this Veep it seems

[Inspector Abberline]

Originally Posted by Demoncrat

I needs to see more of this Veep it seems

Its by the writers and creators of The Thick of It,and its not only as good but its get's better with each series....

[Demoncrat]

I know from the first series that I liked what I have seen. Plus I have a soft spot for Elaine anyhow
All hail the Nuce!! (Iannucci cough)

[Demdike@Cult Labs]

Originally Posted by Dave Boy

DRACULA'S DAUGHTER (1936)

Countess Zaleska:

"Unto Adoni and Aseroth, into the keeping of the lords of the flame and lower pits, I consign this body to be evermore consumed in this purging fire. Let all baleful spirits that threaten the souls of men be banished by the sprinkling of this salt. Be thou exorcised, O Dracula, and thy body long undead, find destruction throughout eternity in the name of thy dark, unholy master. In the name of the all holiest, and through this cross, be the evil spirit cast out until the end of time".


Attachment 207388

I bet she'd have been mightily pissed if all she could conjure up with that incantation was Lugosi.

[Inspector Abberline]

Boy, the pornography industry. They’re such pompous f**ks, huh? You ever look at a hardcore pornographic magazine? They have this disclaimer that says, ‘All of our models are eighteen years and older.’ Uh! These are models all of a sudden. Yeah, tell me something Miss Model: how is jism being worn this year? Is it being worn back, or in bangs, or off the chin? Yeah, these are models. Yeah, here’s Dusty modelling a fourteen-inch cock up her ass. Come on down, Dusty.This is how cocks are worn in Europe, you know. Yep, and here’s Dallas with a penis ensemble. These are models. Yeah, I’m an amuse-ment engineer, OK?....

[Inspector Abberline]

Veep...

Congressman Roger Furlong - You want me to call a Japanese porn shoot, see if I can get you a real job sponging up bukkake parties? Although you might have to lie about working for Meyer.

Jonah - He's already got a job much better than sponging up jizz, right, Kent? (EXHALES)

Selina Meyer -“What are you laughing at, Jolly Green Jizz Face?”

Senator Andrew Doyle - He's a new voice for democracy in the region and would be a major victory for the Doyle Doctrine...
Selina Meyer -You have a doctrine now? What is it, "Boners are rare, don't waste them"?

Jonah: You think you've seen the end of Jonah Ryan? You haven't even seen the start of Jonah Ryan! I'm leaving here with my head held high, and my nuts hanging low on your mom's chin, Martin.

[Susan Foreman]

Television rather than films

The Buddhist philosophy and teaching from the original 'Kung Fu' television show (1972)...and a fine way for children to be bought up, and adults to live their lives

Episode 0: 'Pilot'

Master Po: Ha, ha, never assume because a man has no eyes he cannot see. Close your eyes. What do you hear?
Young Caine: I hear the water, I hear the birds.
Master Po: Do you hear your own heartbeat?
Young Caine: No.
Master Po: Do you hear the grasshopper that is at your feet?
Young Caine: [looking down and seeing the insect] Old man, how is it that you hear these things?
Master Po: Young man, how is it that you do not?

Young Caine: You cannot see.
Master Po: You think I cannot see?
Young Caine: Of all things, to live in darkness must be worst.
Master Po: Fear is the only darkness.

Master Kan: Avoid, rather than check. Check, rather than hurt. Hurt, rather than maim. Maim, rather than kill. For all life is precious, nor can any be replaced.

Caine: Is it good to seek the past, Master Po? Does it not rob the present?
Master Po: If a man dwells on the past, then he robs the present. But if a man ignores the past, he may rob the future. The seeds of our destiny are nurtured by the roots of our past.

Middle Caine: Master Teh?
Master Teh: Yes, student Caine.
Middle Caine: What is the best way to deal with force?
Master Teh: As we prize peace and quiet above victory, there is a simple and preferred method.
Middle Caine: What is that, sir?
Master Teh: Run away!

Episode 1: 'King Of The Mountain'

Young Caine: Master, do we seek victory in contention?
Master Kan: Seek rather not to contend.

Kwai Chang Caine: There is no honor in the taking of a life.

Kwai Chang Caine: Master, our bodies are prey to many needs. Hunger, thirst, the need for love.
Master Kan: In one lifetime, a man knows many pleasures: A mother's smile in the waking hours, a young woman's intimate searing touch and the laughter of grandchildren in the twilight years. To deny these in ourselves is to deny that which makes us one with nature.
Kwai Chang Caine: Shall we then seek to satisfy these needs?
Master Kan: Only acknowledge them and satisfaction will follow. To suppress a truth is to give it force beyond endurance.

Episode 3: 'Blood Brothers'

Kwai Chang Caine: You tell a man he is something less than a man, and say it often enough and even he will believe it.

Episode 4: 'An Eye For An Eye'

Kwai Chang Caine: I know war. It is a word men use to clothe the nakedness of their killing.

Episode 5: 'The Tide'

Master Kan: If, while building a house, a carpenter strikes a nail, it proves faulty by bending. Does the carpenter lose faith in all nails and stop building his house?

Master Kan: [while both watching a dancing girl] What do you feel?
Young Caine: Uncomfortable.
Master Kan: The mind, the body and the spirit are one. When the body expresses the desires of the mind and the spirit then the body is in tune with nature. The act is pure. And there is no shame.
Young Caine: And what is love?
Master Kan: Love is harmony, even in discord.

Episode 7: 'Nine Lives'

Master Po: The hands, Grasshopper, are the eyes and tongue of touch. Through them, a man may reach out and see another's feelings or speak his own.
Kwai Chang Caine: Is it not sad, Master, that the hands of a man may strike a blow as well as caress?
Master Po: Pain and pleasure are like two bells, side by side. And the voice of each makes a trembling in the other.
Kwai Chang Caine: Are pain and pleasure, then, so alike?
Master Po: Are the eyes and the tongue alike? We see the butterfly and an ugly wound. And the same tongue which screams also laughs.

Episode 9: 'The Praying Mantis Kills'

Kwai Chang Caine: When you no longer strive to understand, then you will know... without understanding.

Master Kan: Man, like the animals, is meant to live together with others like himself. But the meaning of belonging to such a group is found in the comfort of silence and the companionship of solitude.

Episode 10: 'Aletha'

Kwai Chang Caine: Each waking moment is as a rung on an endless ladder. Each step we take is built on what has gone before.

Episode 14: 'The Third Man'

Kwai Chang Caine: I seek not to know all the answers, but to understand the questions.

Episode 15: 'The Ancient Warrior'

Young Caine: Master, what is the best way to meet the loss of a loved one?
Master Kan: By knowing that when we truly love, it is never lost... It is only after death that the depth of the bond is truly felt, and our loved one becomes more a part of us than was possible in live.
Young Caine: Are we only able to feel this toward those whom we have known and loved a long time?
Master Kan: Sometimes a stranger, known to us for moments, can spark our souls to kinship for eternity.

[MrBarlow]

Bad Taste.

Derek: im afraid i cant dont that, im a Derek, Derek's dont run.

Derek: Stick all the bits of brains in a plastic bag Barry, we'll need them for analysis.
Barry: No bloddy way mate, you can come down and do that yourself.
Derek: Alright i'll do it after lunch.

The Pink Panther Strikes Again.

Inspector Closeau: Cato where are you my little yellow friend.

Inspector Closeau to dreyfuss: You have a nasty Beump on your head.


Dog Soldiers

Wells: My guts are out Coop.
Cooper: We'll just put em back in.
Wells: They're not going to F@cking fit.
Cooper: ofcourse they'll fit man.
Wells: Cooper knock me out, HIT ME
(Cooper punches him)
Wells: I said Knock me out you f'cking pussy.