Weekly Comp - The Nurse - 29th Oct 2013 - FINISHED
 

Hi everybody,

Welcome to another Cult Labs' competition! This week we're giving away three copies of Shameless' newest release, The Nurse. Here's all the info...


Shameless Screen Entertainment are back! Back with a fun, sleazy release that's perfect for everyone's favorite Yellow company!

This release will mark the first DVD release of The Nurse in the UK!

Ursula Andress (Dr No; Mountain Of The Cannibal God; She) has been voted the top Bond girl of all time, making her mark on cinema in the famous Dr No scene with that bikini. Well, if you've ever wondered what she'd look like without the bikini, then reach for Shameless Screen Entertainment's release of The Nurse (L'infermiera! Literally: Andress is undressed for most part of this pun-filled romp-com.

Jack Palance (Batman; Tango And Cash) plays a mean offbeat American tycoon looking to buy a vineyard in the beautiful Tuscan hills. The old Italian owner, a randy lecher who is convalescing from his last bonk-induced heart-attack, doesn't want to sell, even if his madcap family does. The family hires the gorgeous Nurse, Ursula Andress to ... ahem... undress and give the old man another - and they hope fatal - cardiac arrest!

All barmy, fizzy fun and the clincher - this is the only non-Bond franchise with a second Bond girl! Thunderball's stunning leather-clad biker, Luciana Paluzzi (The Green Slime) stars here without leathers... or anything!


Release Date: 21st October 2013
Special Features: Interviews, Photo Gallery and Trailer Park
Certificate: 18
Run Time: 100mins (approx.)
Year: 1975
Audio: English audio & optional Italian Audio with English
Subtitles available




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TO WIN....

Simply come up with either a movie-inspired illness/disease or a naughty sounding name for a sickness - something that the lovely Ursula could 'cure'. Keep it funny and light, with a name and a little bit about it.

The 3 funniest will be chosen at the end of this competition and rewarded with this film!

Good luck,

Kyle

Nice one Kyle i gotta think really really hard on this one i really want to win this great prize.

The George Lucas Syndrome

http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-7XUPJNlcq0...7439559979.jpg

Symptoms include an uncontrollable urge to defecate on everyone's childhood by revisiting classic films and adding unnecessary CGI, 3D conversions and creating annoying characters that make people want to punch themselves in the head repeatedly.
Other symptoms include the flogging of dead horses with help from fellow beardy, Steven Spielberg ALA Indiana Jones & The Old Man With A Whip

Unfortunately, there is no known cure for this illness, even selling your soul to the company with the mouse won't help matters, but it can be treated temporarily by means of a boycott

http://fc05.deviantart.net/fs71/f/20...ahostudios.png

Dario-rhea

A common affliction where once great film directors' talent and ability further diminishes with each film until the end result is a kind of celluloid diahrea. Can lead to George Lucas Syndrome.

Eg "Wow, with Survival of the Dead George Romero's clearly contracted a case of Dario-rhea"

HAHA! I love romero but you are so right! HAHA brilliant!

Following the director's theme...Michael Bayitis often times referred to as Pain & Gain

A crippling disease that starts in a man's genitals as a burning sensation before the penis swells to the size of a baseball bat. Symptoms include a desire to blow big things up. Ridiculous, paper thin characters. Narcissistic qualities.

Treatment requires a lobotomy.

Tarantino Syndrome.

Similar to tourettes, but with the distinction that you endlessly spout dialogue from Jack Hill films at moments of stress.

Fulcitis-virus causing extreme trauma to the eye!:lol:


Zombie Flesh Eaters - YouTube


The Beyond (1981) Joe the Plumber Eyeball Scene - YouTube


The Beyond: Martha's Death - YouTube


City of the Living Dead - YouTube

Francophobia.

This condition manifests itself during one of his films, so it's the only reactive virus here.
Its symptoms are...........a sense of disorentation during his use of the zoom, an aversion to pubic hair after endless shots of Lina Romay's chuff and to cap it all an intense desire to watch any film with a linear narrative directly after. Even Avaturd.

Worst cases are usually called in after watching Devil Hunter. They knew what they were doing banning this one


only joking

LITTLE HOUSE ON THE PRAIRIE SYNDROME

MAKES A PERSON CONTINUALLY WATCH RE-RUNS OF LITTLE HOUSE WHICH HAS SIDE AFFECTS OF THEIR HAIR SUDDENLY APPEARING PIG-TAILED AND THEY WILL THEN FIND THE NEAREST HILL TO RUN DOWN WHILE THEIR PIGTAILS SWEEP FROM SIDE TO SIDE.