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Old 3rd August 2013, 05:43 PM
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troggi troggi is offline
Cultist on the Rampage
 
Join Date: Feb 2013
Location: Portsmouth, UK
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Quote:
Originally Posted by keirarts View Post
Goatman murders

If I reach old age, I fully expect to order a 50 film set off Amazon to wile away those cold winter nights and find this on it. I'd describe it as 'cheap as shit' but then my pal Jim the farmer would point out manure goes for a few bob these days. I'm sure fertilizing a field would cost a few quid more than the budget to this...

A bunch of assholes head into the woods to drink, smoke pot and screw. The budget of the damn film couldn't stretch to a country retreat, or even a shed for poor old Goatman so the plan seems to be just wandering aimlessly around the woods in a marijuana haze. I've done this, it isn't fun, you get real hungry and contemplate eating bark.

But enough about my mis-spent youth. What our bro's and byatches don't realise is the 'infamou' goatman is also wandering the woods. He don't like the chronic though so instead he gets his rocks off murdering as many people as he can find. Fortunately for him, these woods are almost as populated as 'dont go in the woods' (of which this film is of comparable quality) and there is plenty of fodder for the Goatman. Unfortunately the cool looking costume/monster prosthetic was unaffordable (seriously, even reveng of billy the kid could afford that!) so its just a bloke in a mask.


Theres a whole bunch of random junk in the film including a random shot of ginger prosthetic willy which is now famous on these forums. I had hoped for a night of the demon style dick-rip but I guess the director couldent be arsed and thought the old arrow through the skull was more creative. It isn't

I enjoyed this film in spite of myself. It has an 'unhinged meets just a small dose of anthropophagus' quality that I enjoyed. Its basically mean-spirited trashy nonsense with excessive gore. The 4:3 ratio gave it a vhs feel as well. Not bad for less than a quid.
I truly wish that I'd paid less than a quid for it!
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