Doctor Who over the years: Episode quotes
The Magicians Apprentice
Boy: Help me! Someone, please! Help me! Help me!
(A sonic screwdriver flies through the air and lands at his feet.) The Doctor [OC]: Your chances of survival are about one in a thousand. So here's what you do. You forget the thousand, and you concentrate on the one. Pick it up. I said, pick it up!
(The boy obeys.) I'm straight ahead of you, about fifty feet. Can you see me?
(The smoke clears to reveal the Tardis and the Doctor.) The device in your hand is creating an acoustic corridor, so that we can talk. Do you understand?
Boy: Who are you?
The Doctor: Oh, I'm just a passer-by. I was looking for a bookshop. How do you think I'm doing?
Boy: This isn't a bookshop.
The Doctor: No, this is a war. A very old one, going by the mix of technology. Which war is this? I get them all muddled up.
Boy: It's just the war.
The Doctor: Where am I? What planet is this?
Boy: I don't understand.
The Doctor: Well, neither do I. I try never to understand. It's called an open mind. Now, you have got to make a choice.
Boy: A choice?
The Doctor: Yes, you have got to decide that you're going to live. Survival is just a choice. Choose it now.
Boy: If I move, they'll get me.
The Doctor: I told you, you have one chance in a thousand. But one is all you ever need. What's your name? Come on, faith in the future. Introduce yourself! Tell me the name of the boy who isn't going to die today.
Boy: Davros. My name is Davros. Hello? Are you still there? Please, you've got to help me. You said I could survive. You said you'd help me. Help me!
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Ohila: Welcome, Colony Sarff. We are the Sisterhood of Karn. If you do not leave our world immediately, we will take your skin.
Colony Sarff: Where is the Doctor?
Ohila: Where he always is. Right behind you, and one step ahead. Tread carefully when you seek the Doctor, Colony Sarff, or he will be the last thing you find.
Colony Sarff: Davros, creator of the Daleks, dark Lord of Skaro.
Ohila: What of him?
Colony Sarff: Davros is dying.
Ohila: Davros is ancient. He should have been dust centuries ago.
Colony Sarff: He has a message for the Doctor.
Ohila: Then you will give it to me.
(Colony Sarff writhes as if trying to change shape or something.) Your powers mean nothing here. Give me the message and leave.
Colony Sarff: Tell the Doctor, Davros knows. Davros remembers. Tell him he must face Davros one last time.
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Clara: Kate, we can't just phone the Doctor and bleat, he'll go Scottish.
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Clara: Since when do you care about the Doctor?
Missy: Since always. Since the Cloister Wars. Since the night he stole the moon and the President's wife. Since he was a little girl. One of those was a lie. Can you guess which one?
Clara: He's not your friend. You keep trying to kill him.
Missy: He keeps trying to kill me. It's sort of our texting. We've been at it for ages.
Clara: Mmm. Must be love.
Missy: Oh, don't be disgusting. We're Time Lords, not animals.
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Missy: You probably want to throw up, don't you? Pick a local. According to you, this is where the Doctor is.
Clara: Okay, how do we find him? How do we know what we're looking for?
Missy: Anachronisms. The slightest, tiniest
(an electric guitar riff fills the area) anachronisms.
(The Doctor enters the under the portcullis on a tank, playing rock guitar and wearing shades. The crowd love it. Bors lowers his axe in despair. The Doctor finishes the riff and bows to the Lord and Lady as his speakers give feedback. He is wearing checkered trousers and a black frock coat.) Bors: Dude! What is that?
The Doctor: You said you wanted an axe fight.
(Some chuckles.) Oh, come on. In a few hundred years, that'll be really funny. It's a slow burner.
Bors: A musical instrument is not an axe.
The Doctor: Yes, and a daffodil is not a broadsword, but I still won the last round!
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The Doctor: Davros is the child of war, a war that wouldn't end. A thousand years of fighting, till nobody could remember why. So Davros, he created a new kind of warrior, one that wouldn't bother with that question. A mutant in a tank that would never, ever stop. And they never did.
Clara: The Daleks?
The Doctor: How scared must you be to seal every one of your own kind inside a tank?
(a pause) Davros made the Daleks, but who made Davros?
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The Doctor: Skaro! You've brought me to Skaro.
Davros: Where does an old man go to die, but with his children?
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Missy: You know what this is? This thing you're about to destroy? I'll tell you! It's the dog's unmentionables. And you know all about those, don't you?
(Missy tickles a Dalek's ball.) This is a Tardis. With this, you can go anywhere, do anything, kill anyone. With this, the Daleks can be more powerful than ever before.
(She climbs up onto a ledge opposite the Tardis and the Daleks all turn to look at her. Clara is trying to edge towards the door.) You just need one thing.
The Doctor:
(sotto) No. Missy, no!
Missy: Me. You need me. A Time Lady, to show you how it works. With this and with me, everything can be yours. And you can burn it all, for ever and ever and ever.
(long pause) Or would you rather just kill me?
(The Daleks turn to their leader.) Dalek Supreme: Maximum extermination.
Dalek: Exterminate.
(The Daleks fire. Missy's skeleton is briefly visible before she is completely gone.)
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The Doctor: Please! Please, I'm begging you. Please, please. Please, save Clara.
Davros: I gave the Daleks life. I do not control them.