Doctor Who over the years: Episode quotes
The Zygon Inversion
The Doctor: Any questions?
Osgood: Why do you have a Union Jack parachute?
The Doctor: Er, camouflage.
Osgood: Camouflage?
The Doctor: Yes, we're in Britain
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The Doctor: You know I'm over two thousand years old? I'm old enough to be your Messiah.
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The Doctor: London! What a dump.
Osgood: London's okay.
The Doctor: No, it's not, it's a dump.
Osgood: You spend an awful lot of time here, considering it's a dump.
The Doctor: I spend an awful lot of time being kidnapped, tortured, shot at and exterminated. Doesn't mean I like it.
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The Doctor: You just want cruelty to beget cruelty. You're not superior to people who were cruel to you. you're just a whole bunch of new cruel people. A whole bunch of new cruel people being cruel to some other people, who'll end up being cruel to you. The only way anyone can live in peace is if they're prepared to forgive. Why don't you break the cycle?
Zygon Clara: Why should we?
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(The Zygons advance on the Doctor and Osgood. Kate shoots them in the back of their heads.) Kate: Sorry, Doctor. Self-defence.
The Doctor: You're you.
Kate: I'm me.
The Doctor: How did you survive?
(Kate recalls the moment that Norlander transformed. She raised her gun and blam! blam! blam! blam! blam!) Kate: Five rounds rapid.
(Angry Zygon Clara throws the mobile phone at the wall.) I'm sorry, Doctor. I know you don't approve.
The Doctor: Why does peacekeeping always involve killing?
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Zygon Clara: Why are you doing this?
Kate: Yes, I'd quite like to know that, too. You set this up. Why?
The Doctor: Because it's not a game, Kate. This is a scale model of war. Every war ever fought, right there in front of you. Because it's always the same. When you fire that first shot, no matter how right you feel, you have no idea who's going to die! You don't know whose children are going to scream and burn! How many hearts will be broken! How many lives shattered! How much blood will spill until everybody does until what they were always going to have to do from the very beginning. Sit down and talk!
(sigh) Listen to me. Listen, I just, I just want you to think. Do you know what thinking is? It's just a fancy word for changing your mind.
Zygon Clara: I will not change my mind.
The Doctor: Then you will die stupid. Alternatively, you could step away from that box, you can walk right out of that door and you could stand your revolution down.
Zygon Clara: No! I'm not stopping this, Doctor. I started it. I will not stop it. You think they'll let me go, after what I've done?
The Doctor: You're all the same, you screaming kids. You know that? Look at me, I'm unforgivable. Well, here's the unforeseeable. I forgive you. After all you've done, I forgive you.
Zygon Clara: You don't understand. You will never understand.
The Doctor: I don't understand? Are you kidding? Me? Of course I understand. I mean, do you call this a war? This funny little thing? This is not a war! I fought in a bigger war than you will ever know. I did worse things than you could ever imagine. And when I close my eye, I hear more screams than anyone could ever be able to count! And do you know what you do with all that pain? Shall I tell you where you put it? You hold it tight till it burns your hand, and you say this. No one else will ever have to live like this. No one else will have to feel this pain. Not on my watch!
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Osgood: The Tardis.
The Doctor: The Tardis.
Osgood: What does it stand for?
The Doctor: What? You're kidding me? Surely you know that?
Osgood: Well, I've heard a couple of different versions.
The Doctor: I made it up from the initials. It stands for*Totally And Radically Driving In Space. Do you want to come? All of the future, all of history, and all of the universe?
Osgood: More than anything. But I think I have to stay. I've got a couple of boxes to keep an eye on. And a world to keep safe.