that's what who i went to see it with said, better than the second but not as good as the 1st

THE SEVERED ARM – One of life's big questions - “under what circumstances will I resort to cannibalism?” - is put to a bunch of starving, hopeless guys trapped deep underground. They're rescued before they have to come up with an answer, but not before they hack off the arm of one of their number in anticipation. Years later, said amputee starts to visit his ex-buddies with a view to violent revenge. 'The Severed Arm' is a proto-slasher movie from the nineteen seventies. It has its flaws, but is really quite good. The tone is grim but shrill, somehow summed up by the way the film's credit sequence emblazons the title, 'The Severed Arm', over a shot of a dummy severed arm whilst the soundtrack blares out some grating but eerie electronic noise. That's really the tone of most of the movie, if you incorporate the essence of lots of scenes of people sitting around and talking. There is a drag factor (isn't there always?), but 'The Severed Arm' is actually quite fast paced for its time, and is eased along by some reasonable acting and some quite effective sequences. The script and direction might be awkward, but it has some grainy seventies 'strangeness of form' on its side. Going back to the soundtrack for instance, there is a really obvious “electronics are still a novelty” vibe to it, and it's a great collage of discordant synthesiser squiggles although it might be a bit omnipresent for some. I'm also a big fan of crude seventies movie psychedelia – wonky angles, fisheye lenses, slow motion and the like – and some of that is in evidence here, together with a generally murky, shadowy atmosphere. Definitely check it out if you like grindhouse obscurities, or, for that matter, slasher forerunners, of which 'The Severed Arm' is an overlooked example. Plenty of public domain type versions on the market, but you can also catch it on YouTube.

ALIEN 3000 – Haven't checked in with Jeff LeRoy for a while, but his films always bring a smile to my face. 'Alien 3000' is a pretty good example of his schtick, being gleefully bad whilst holding back from parody (only just, though). 'Alien 3000' is about a cave full of treasure which seems to be guarded by an invisible alien. No prizes for guessing where Jeff got that 'concept' from, but thankfully the monster also materialises as an awful early CGI effect and also as a rubbish Dr Who monster type practical effect. Anyway, the story follows some army types, a made up government bureau of paranormal investigators and some mercenaries (?) who covene at the site of this cave and try to figure out what's going on / kill alien / snatch treasure etc etc. As befits a low budget movie about an alien in a cave, there's lots of wandering around and chatting to 'sustain tension', but also the required trash factor – monster battles and excessive gore. Well, not too excessive, and 'Alien 3000' doesn't have the incessant craziness of the LeRoy classic 'Rat Scratch Fever', but it's not afraid to sling some entrails when asked. Cheap, plastic, disposable dreck – that's what it's all about, though. I wonder what people will make of films like this in thirty or forty years time, whether they'll be given 16K Holo-Ray special editions, or whether they'll be even talked about at all.

Man from Deep River (1972)

In which Italian hack director Umberto Lenzi attempted to rip off A Man Called Horse (1970) using Ivan Rassimov instead of Richard Harris, and Thai jungle tribes instead of native American Indians and inadvertently created the cannibal horror film.

Overloaded with animal violence - the slaying of the alligator is particularly nasty as they slice open it's stomach as it flails about, although my dog Milli loved the mongoose / snake fight, absolutely glued to the screen she was - Man From Deep River isn't actually that interesting exploitation wise, The cannibal action is limited to a single scene and isn't at the forefront of Lenzi's ambition. The film is largely about Rassimov - a white man from the city - his induction into a primitive jungle tribe and his subsequent love affair with tribes girl Me Me Lai. (If ever a name came from a Frankie Howerd sketch it's Me Me Lai).

Whilst nowhere near the best work of either Rassimov, Lenzi or the seemingly stoned throughout Lai, Man From Deep River has more going for it than the majority of Italian cannibal films.

The Shriek Show dvd positively sparkles, so good is it's picture quality, so i can only imagine how good the truncated Blu-Ray from 88 will look.

I watched Don't Open Til Xmas again, followed by The Long Good Friday (w/comm this time). DOTX still redolent with that British stiffness that I loves, Alan Lake looking a bit "tired and emotional" at times ahem.

The TLGF comm is a bit of a disappointment, Mackenzie hasn't seen the film "in 20 years", and spends most of his time describing what's on screen. Meh.

Also rewatched Friday The 13th (1980).
A film that may be familiar to those on here. Say what you like, Sean, you couldn't have made Halloween, as you have no love for the genre. Still contains one of my favourite "You're all DOOMED!!" scenes.

Both Sold!! Ahem. Great to read as always F!!

The Stuff (1985)

***1/2 out of *****


Warcraft (2016)

This was a lot better than I expected it to be considering how crap the trailers were and the mostly mixed to negative reviews. I actually quite enjoyed it.

*** out of *****

Satan's Baby Doll (1982)

Even at a measly 74 minutes, Mario Bianchi's La Bimba di Satana is a hopelessly padded, muddled mess where a few sex scenes aside nothing of note actually happens.

Yes it has a nice Gothic atmosphere and a cast of fine Euro starlets intent on taking their clothes off but that really is everything. It's not scary, gory, nor is it especially sexy.

Shameless to their credit have produced an edition as complete as can be minus the hardcore sex, but all that's added is additional soft core nudity from a ropey film print that in truth adds nothing to what is a virtually plot less story.

Any fans of Satan's Baby Doll that want to argue it's case?

I'd love to, but it's long overdue a second watch – I can't remember much about it.

Recently watched that new Ghostbusters movie.. wasn't as bad as I thought it would be, but then again it wasn't great either lol probably give it a 4/10

Whilst I quite enjoy it, I doubt I (or anyone for that matter!) could argue that it is a good film. ;)

Mirror (1975)

Andrei Tarkovsky's semi-biographical story of a dying man remembering his childhood past and in particular his mother. In a bizarre twist of symbolism the same actor plays both his son (in current time) and he as a child (in the 30's) while the same actress plays both his mother and his wife.

I wont bother giving a complex review as I don't fully understand everything which I saw but it was an excellent dreamlike experience with some absolutely stand-out cinematography including this dream sequence from towards the start of the film.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TlRN1bvVd28

DEATH FACTORY – No budget schlockola from Brad Sykes. In it, a bunch of college students (some of whom are quite weirdly characterised) find themselves looking for a place to party when one them remembers “that old chemical factory on the edge of town”. You know, that abandoned chemical factory, the one that obviously looks nothing like an actual chemical factory because, well, no one could get enough money together for sets. So, college guys, you'll have to make do with an empty house with some test tubes in it, not that anyone in their right minds would want to get loaded there anyway. Obviously, be ready to get murdered one by one. First, do some shagging, some arguing, plenty of wandering around in the dark, the usual stuff. If it gets boring, we've got Tiffany Shepis dressed up as a cross between Johnny Scissorhands and that monster out of Demons 2 who starts off as someone's sister. 'Death Factory' frequently does get boring, but I like it anyway. It certainly has its charms. Even if you're not a fan of camcorder-esque production values, even if you want to revile it for taking the standard slasher / teens getting offed in a house template and doing absolutely nothing with it, you've still got to make allowances for some things. There's quite sadistic gore (lovingly and lingeringly beheld by aforementioned camcorder), some t&a with a ludicrous soundtrack, and there are priceless moments such as one which sees a fake cardboard wall come loose and totter over two actors who obviously don't know whether to keep on fighting or press the wall back in place, so try to do both. Taken on these terms, 'Death Factory' is quite a lot of fun, and also has that elusive 'dream like because it's incompetent' feel to it in places a mon avis. It's interesting, if you look at stats on IMDB or places like that you'll learn that, latterly, around a thousand horror films are being produced per year. I'll bet that the bulk of those are spiritually more akin to 'Death Factory' than to 'The Witch' or 'Neon Demon'. Where do all those movies go? They seem to pass by like shadows. Brad Sykes also made no-budgeter 'Goth', which is actually a really good film.

One for the 'to buy' list then. :nod:

Worryingly i have more Brad Sykes films than i do Tarkovsky, Bertolucci
and Fassbinder put together.

:glitter:

I had to look him up as I don't know who he is :lol: I haven't seen any but 'Goth' was on Amazon Video, I don't know if it still is.

'Creature Feature' double-bill. I have a soft spot for both these films.

Infestation is a b-movie special as mankind is enslaved by insects! It's a fun ride with a good last line - looking off into the distance after surviving the infestation "Is that....?" Suggesting a new problem to face.

Deep Rising is a b-movie with a big budget. Huge underwater gribbly attacks ocean liner with disparate groups of people acting at odds with each other trying to survive. Another great line to finish - "Now what?"

Star trek beyond.

I know a lot of 'traditional' trekkies get bent out of shape about these films but honestly I have no problems with them and I was raised in a houshold where Trek was on all the times and the summer Trek film was a family event. This latest one should hopefully appeal to both regular film goers and trekkies as it feels much more like the original franchise while retaining terrific fast paced action. (Though I've just found a review online that argues the action feels 'wrong' in a trek film :rolleyes:) Its a lot of fun, refuses to get dull, gets rid of all the lens flare shit and it turns out Justin lin was a great pick as a director.

its strange these fans that say action is out of place in a star trek film, when you ask them what there favourite film is its either wrath of khan or first contact both very action based movies with little or nothing to do with the message of the old series etc, and yet there least favourite is the motion picture which is probably the most "star trek" of all :pound:

I've always found Wrath of Khan to be overrated. :hide:

My top 5 being

First Contact
The Undiscovered Country
The Voyage Home
Insurrection
The Motion Picture

Jason Goes to Hell: The Final Friday (1993)

The 9th installment in the long running Friday the 13th series.

In a final attempt to kill supernatural serial killer Jason Vorhees for good, a crack military group trap him and at last blow up Jason for good in a hail of bullets and an explosion as we see him disintegrate into a million gory pieces.

Sadly for those who think the Friday films are a cliched waste of time all this happens before the opening credits. What follows is a completely different beast of a film taking it's cues from sci-fi films such as The Hidden as the spirit of Jason Vorhees hijacks various unlucky hosts in a bid to make himself whole and reborn again through a member of his original bloodline.

Talk about a convoluted plot, however this first film in the series to be produced by New Line Cinema takes the idea of mass killer Jason in a bold new way. Hopping from host to host means the hulking killer isn't actually in the film an awful lot, although Jason actor Kane Hodder does get a cameo as a police officer at the morgue where Jason's supposedly unbeating heart is taken following his destruction. However it's the lack of the hockey masked killer that also acts as a drawback. He is after all the reason to watch this series of slasher films.

Jason Goes to Hell is fast paced, exciting and a lot of fun. New Line up the gore content considerably with some very gooey practical effects, one scene midway through is 'jaw dropping'. The final scene is also a bit of a jaw dropper but in a different way as it rather unexpectedly features a brief cameo from another iconic horror character which paves the way for a sort of sequel some ten years later.

Just started bad moon on Blu Ray. What amazing job has been done with the picture quality. Its fantastic for such a old not so well knowing movie it buts a lot of new films to shame

Q Planes (1939)

Extremely entertaining pre-war thriller with a wicked streak of humour about test flights for new bomber planes which inexplicably go missing whilst out over the sea. Laurence Olivier and Valerie Hobson star as the test pilot and reporter attempting to figure out whats happening, all the while Ralph Richardson's Major Hammond seems one step ahead of everyone with his wild ideas about a strange device which grounds planes.

Despite the obvious talents of Olivier, Ralph Richardson steals the film from under him. His ever so slightly mad Major owns each and every scene, his quick witted, eccentric repertoire adds a lot of humour to potentially po-faced pre-war proceedings as well as great energy. The film seems to have a decent budget and it shows with plenty of flying scenes as well as ocean going sequences. Added to this there's a lengthy gun battle aboard a German frigate towards the end.

I really enjoyed Q Planes. Highly recommended.

Network's dvd looks terrific.

THE COLLECTOR – I watched 'The Collector' on its initial UK DVD release, and turned to it again because I couldn't remember much about it. I guess I was expecting something typical of its time – it was made in 2009, when the genre was still glutted with attempts to rip of the likes of 'Saw' and 'Hostel'. Well, my expectations weren't entirely off the mark, but on the other hand, there's more to 'The Collector' than yet more mediocre 'torture porn'. The set up is fairly standard – thief with a heart is trying to raise some cash to placate his ex's loan sharks, and hits on the idea of ripping off the rich household of his former employers. Only, on the night he breaks in he finds that there's someone else in the house – a sadist with a creepy mask and a way with setting traps. A reliance on mechanical novelty as the source of graphic horror isn't the only move 'The Collector' cops from the 'Saw' sequels (unsurprisingly, as the director was involved in the latter franchise), but there are aspects that elevate it beyond mere imitation. Mostly, these are to do with style. Whilst the filtered look of the 'Saw' series is around, it's deployed in a more thoughtful way here, and the result has a dense, richly textured feel that seems quite ominous. Also, some of the set pieces are elaborate, almost baroque – there's a great sequence involving the daughter of the house and her boyfriend, soundtracked to good effect by 'Bela Lugosi's Dead'. All of this propels 'The Collector' more towards Italian territory almost, a line that was taken further with its sequel, 'The Collection' (which I remember really liking at the time). If you're looking for something brutal and visually compelling, I would defintely check out 'The Collector'.

Excellent write-up, as usual, Frankie. I saw this at the cinema and haven't watched it since, though I seem to remember something about a sequel (The Collection?), which I intended to check out and watch.

I agree completely with your analysis and thoughts, with the film being suitably nasty but different enough from the Saw and Hostel films to stand on its own two feet – onto the Lovefilm rental queue it goes!

I've only watched my dvd once. I did enjoy it though, time for a rewatch i think.

Never seen The Collection.

The Teardrop influence grows ever stronger.

Batman: The Killing Joke (2016)

If it weren’t for the unnecessary, misguided, badly written and overlong Batgirl prologue, I would give this a higher rating as the rest of it - the actual adaptation of the graphic novel - is excellent.

*** out of *****


The Woods (2006)

***1/2 out of *****

JONAH HEX... here we go, first the positive, Josh Brolin is very good as our semi-zombie lead IMHO, and the audio fireworks are room shaking good, however everything else seems to be in another movie entirely:lol:, as for the plot it's a direct steal from the Will Smith film Wild Wild West with a fair bit of Outlaw Josey Wales thrown in and botched in both attempts, the other actors should receive a proper slapping too, Megan(shot in soft focus throughout)Fox in a ridiculous love interest side plot comes across as a crap superhero-slut, and as for John Malkovich... he plays the villain as if he's a mono-tone French aristocrat from the Three Musketeers and not a crazy renegade southern general, although miscast he should have come up something better than that tosh, but having said all that if you switch your brain off it was a reasonable trashy Poundshop buy IMHO.

So if you can pick it up for £1 you can have a laugh at it's crass plot rip-offs and enjoy the rubbish acting from Malkovich.

Right then Plato, firstly if Megan Fox needs a slapping then I'm your man. Cos lets be honest, slap and spank aren't that far apart. And if she was a "superhero slut" should the film not have been amazing???

Beach Volleyball Detectives.

Some old guff about terrorist at a volleyball match. If you like close ups of Japanese women's' gussets, then this is the film for you. The title song is a reworking of this...but about volleyball.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0IO3D8YCo7o

If only...

I prefer The Collection to the The Collector tbh. Both are pretty good films though.

Bone Tomahawk.

Finally got around to watching this yesterday. When a suspicious drifter strolls into the inn in the pleasant frontier town of Bright Hope, Kurt Russell's, Sheriff Hunt decides to question the man, shooting him in the leg when he tries to flee. Sticking him in a cell the Sheriff sends Bruder to fetch the towns female doctor. Leaving the doctor, the prisoner and a deputy at the station the Sheriff heads home to his wife. Next morning all three are missing and a local stablehand is found butchered. A local indian guide identifies arrows found at the scene as belonging to a small remote cave dwelling tribe in the mountains a few days trek from Bright Hope. Sheriff Hunt, his deputy Chicory (a fantastic turn from Richard Jenkins) Brooder and the docs crippled husband Arthur set off on a rescue mission. So far so Searchers. Except here is where things get interesting. These aren't your average cliche Western redskins. These things are bloody scary, barely human and a genuinely unnerving sight to behold. S.Craig Zahlers western/horror is deserving of every bit of hype its recieved, from the opening scene, to the climax this film contains some of the most disturbing scenes I've seen in a long time. Performancea across the board are pitch perfect, especially as I've said Richard Jenkins as old timer Deputy Chicory a man still mourning the loss of his wife and determined to be more than just an old man. It takes obvious inspiration from Fords supposed classic The Searchers though it pisses all over it in the process, but then so does Police Academy 5 as far as I'm concerned. There's more than a nod to The Hills Have Eyes here too. Brilliant brilliant film that isn't scared to take its time getting where it's going, highly recommended.

Bad moon

Fantastic werewolf movie that I recommend to any one who likes gore, horror and werewolf's. At just over 80 minutes it felt even shorter because of the fast pace. Some great effects and gore. But the star of the film is not the the gore,the werewolf or even the human stars but Thor the German Shepard who becomes his family's protector against the werewolf . 9.2/10

Next up after the episode of eureka I'm watching is black roses. Which I've not seen before so peoples views on it would be welcome

Just watched Cherry Falls which i bought last week. I quite enjoyed it actually. A decent enough slasher movie that for some reason is marketed as a hilarious comedy/horror, yet hardly tries to raise a titter, let alone create one. The funniest bit was almost the last shot of the movie. Still, it does a good job of making most of the cast suspicious at one time or another during its lean 85 minute run-time. Not a comedy/horror like advertised, just a high-school slasher with one or two amusing bits that might actually be the better for not living up to its blurb.

It's heavily cut, don't know if you knew. You can't get an uncut version unfortunately.

Still it's a good film all the same.

Unless they cut some jokes out, still doesn't make it a comedy horror like it says on the tin!

Yeah, you can tell there's some cuts. To be honest, what's left is pretty tame. I enjoyed it though. :nod:

Death Line. 1972 (?) Gary Sherman.

A young couple find a man collapsed in the tube station, they report the man to a police officer but on returning down to the platform the man is gone. Turns out a few people have disappeared in this particular part of the underground but because this lastest man happens to be an important civil servant things start getting taken seriously. As events unfold it turns out a cannibal descended from workers trapped during a roof collapse a century earlier is living in the abandoned tunnels.
First time for me this grisly early 70's Brit horror. Donald Pleasance stars as the investigating inspector and is great as ever with an odd quirky performance. The cannibal himself only referred to as 'The Man' in the credits is played by relatively unknown Hugh Armstrong and gives an interesting turn as a somewhat sympathetic creation, prowling the tube at night for victims/food in the only way he's ever known. Given his ancestors were abandoned by a government that didn't want to spend the money and resources digging them out it could be argued that 'The Man' is actually yet another man made monster. The London Underground is also a great setting and I'm fascinated by the reality that there apparently miles of abandoned tunnels and stations down there. So all in all a very good film and while Network's dvd isn't awful a decent blu or even a remastered dvd with some nice extras would be welcomed.

Excellent 70s flick. :nod: