What Films Have You Seen Recently?

[iank]

Glad I inspired you, Mr Barlow!

[Frankie Teardrop]

LOVE BRIDES OF THE BLOOD MUMMY – Victorian scientist in a big castle has the bright idea of reanimating a supernatural rapist from Ancient Egypt in this baffling early seventies Euro horror. A lot of LBOTBM is taken up with Pharoah having his sleazy way, but there’s enough weirdness besides to leave you at least a little bit dizzy – it’s the net effect of the gorgeously derelict castle interiors, the haunting coastline visuals, long stetches of silence vs wonky pulp narration “he spent hours standing outside my cage, gloating at me”, bursts of crappy stop motion and a climax involving one of my favourite horror things, a crawling severed hand. Like Hammer, if they were into roughies set in 19th cent Cornwall and were Spanish.

L.A. WARS – Either like a deathbed hallucination of every crap action movie you watched in the nineties, or a badly edited feature length trailer; ‘LA Wars’ heads for that forbidden zone where only films like ‘Samurai Cop’ survive. Lots of people shoot each other, electronic rock and dry ice combine, mullets are in evidence, bad actors scream nonsense lines that sound lifted from the blurb on the back of a VHS cover… etc. Obviously, a tough guy ex-cop reclaims his lost honour. I don’t really like action movies because they’re generally a bit too hectic, but I dig the really really bad stuff - ‘Champagne And Bullets’, ‘Dangerous Men’ and so forth. ‘L.A Wars’ is just about coherent enough to pass as something a bit more normal, but it still feels like it could only ever exist in a basement video shop that smells of damp and greasy chips.

[gag]

The strays,

While is not perfect it’s still reasonable decent and watchable, a Netflix film, about a women who thinks she something she not, until one day the past catches up with her, definitely a Jordan Peele style film..

[MrBarlow]

The Doorman. 2020.

Ruby Rose plays a soldier assigned to protect a ambassador and her family until they are assassinated and returns to New York and takes a doorman job until theives break in looking for a art collection and tries to save her family.

What a lead man can do in a action film a woman can try and do just the same, and add in a little bit of a Die Hard with secret rooms and passages that would be better in a horror movie. Jean Reno just manages to save this film as the leader of the thieves who has a old friend hiding the priceless art around the building. The action sequences are not too bad and creative in creating a small bomb that leaves a body mark on the wall is a bit cartoonish. It was never be a spectacular film a rewatch may happen but not any time soon.

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[nicholasrope]

Originally Posted by MrBarlow

The Doorman. 2020.

Ruby Rose plays a soldier assigned to protect a ambassador and her family until they are assassinated and returns to New York and takes a doorman job until theives break in looking for a art collection and tries to save her family.

What a lead man can do in a action film a woman can try and do just the same, and add in a little bit of a Die Hard with secret rooms and passages that would be better in a horror movie. Jean Reno just manages to save this film as the leader of the thieves who has a old friend hiding the priceless art around the building. The action sequences are not too bad and creative in creating a small bomb that leaves a body mark on the wall is a bit cartoonish. It was never be a spectacular film a rewatch may happen but not any time soon.

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Originally Posted by MrBarlow

Piggy. 2022.

Sara is a over weight teen tormented by a couple of girls, one day her tormentors go too far only to be spotted by a stranger who stands up for her and things begin to spiral for them both.

This is listed as a horror and what feels like it's described as a revenge film but isn't, yeah it can be uncomfortable to watch, even though the main actress is over 21 yet she does look young for her age, Laura Galan does play the part well. This doesn't rely on gore even though we do see some after effects. The first act of seeing how she is tormented is a good build up and how it effects her and being abused by two yokels can be upsetting. When it gets to the second can drag on a bit too much then the final part makes up for it with a great build up of tension. This was made in Spain there is the Spanish audio with subtitles and dubbed version...don't go for the dubbed it is well out of sync and really bad at times. I'd certainly watch this again.

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Regarding Piggy, I must have misinterpreted the trailer and reviews beforehand because I thought she united with the Killer. Think that would have made for a better storyline.

[nicholasrope]

Originally Posted by MrBarlow

Train To Busan. 2016.

Every once in a while a decent foreign horror movie makes it's mark and the Korean's don't disappoint with this. What starts off as a normal day for commuters with radio broadcasting a infection and being trapped on a express train with one person being infected and then turning most of the passengers into blood thirsty zombies.

There is a good character build up of a father and daughter who live together but have a strained relationship, two elderly sisters taking a trip, a small group of high schoolers, a husband and his pregnant wife, and a C.O.O. of a bus company. The writers did create people from different walks of life who are strangers then band together in order to survive.

It is a interesting start as you can only guess what the outbreak is caused by and somewhat government cover up is in motion then we see the first infected person on board and then all hell breaks looks that it seemed to copy 28 Days Later, one bite and 30 seconds later or so and full blown zombie transformation. Second time seeing this and didn't disappoint.

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When I watched this during lockdown, I found this to be utterly enthralling and thoroughly entertained by this,.

Shame about the sequel though

[MrBarlow]

Originally Posted by nicholasrope

Regarding Piggy, I must have misinterpreted the trailer and reviews beforehand because I thought she united with the Killer. Think that would have made for a better storyline.

It would have helped the ending, but at the same time the killer did show her how to step and stand up to bullies at the same time.

[nicholasrope]

No Hard Feelings

Jennifer Lawrence needs cash quickly, so she answers a ad in which she has to seduce and sleep with a socially awkward Teenager. But it doesn't go as quickly and smoothly as she thinks. If you read the reviews, you think that it's a awful film, it isn't. there is a certain charm to it and there is a funny scene at the Beach. However there was one comment that says if you remove the Comedy and have it as a serious Film then it's much better. That would make an interesting Extra.

Are You Scared?

6 seemingly random strangers wake up in a warehouse and realize that they are in a Game where they have to conquer their worst fears but it ends up going wrong violently. Yes it's a Saw rip-off but it's short and I did find it entertaining.

Miseducation of Cameron Post

Chloe Grace Moretz is a Gay Teen who is sent to a Conversation Camp but ends up united with other residents. a more serious version of But I'm A Cheerleader, it has some good moments and performances but it has something missing that makes it memorable.

22 Jump Street

Sequel which sees Channing Tatum and Jonah Hill reprise their roles and get sent to College to investigate another Drugs Ring. Better than the original and I like the references to bigger budgets, keeping the same ideas..etc and Ice Cubes reactions to finding out that his Daughter is dating Jonah Hill is rather good but it was too long.

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles

The original 1990 version which sees the Turtles try to stop a Crime wave orchestrated by The Footclan. It's cheesy but it's fun. Originally I was going to see this at the Cinema, but I said that I wanted to see a lower budget, a Film that it's original Distributer had no faith in and sold it, a Film that people thought would flop because of what it's up against:

Home Alone, I think it did well

Street Warrior

Max Martini (Somebody who may recognize when you see him) is a former Soldier enters a Underground Fighting Tournament after his Brother is seriously injured to gain revenge on the person holding it, Nick Chinland (He's been in a few Films) Some good Action scenes and I've always enjoyed this. Martini is pretty decent in a leading role and Chinland can make a good villain.

[MrBarlow]

Originally Posted by nicholasrope

Are You Scared?

6 seemingly random strangers wake up in a warehouse and realize that they are in a Game where they have to conquer their worst fears but it ends up going wrong violently. Yes it's a Saw rip-off but it's short and I did find it entertaining.

This one i actually enjoyed, I know there is a second one and have seen it but can't remember much about it.

[MrBarlow]

The Night God Screamed. 1971.

This was a strange obscure film from the early 70s that may have caused a bit of controversy regarding a cult founder and his followers. Even from the trailer it looks like it was inspired by the murders of Charles Manson, a weirdo with a beardo, white monks robe and spouting the usual god told him to do it. I have never heard of this one maybe due to poor distribution or one that has been forgotten about, this does not rely on gore or go over the top with violence but relies more on tension and some decent acting. Jeanne Crain stars as the wife of a preacher who becomes a victim of Michael Sugich and his followers and once prosecuted begins a campaign of cat and mouse terror. I will admit the lead up to the finale is not well executed but certainly not boring.

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