Fake Flick Grind-O-Rama: Capsule Reviews

With so many Cult Labs Alternative Universe films out there in the wacky world of Made up movies, I've decided to share them with you in the form of mini capsule reviews

1980 Lost Voyage of the Disco Pirates

Director: Hodge Rental

When Chad, Frisky and Danny the Sleaze fall through a warp on the dancefloor of Studio 54, they find themselves a world away from the glitz, glamour and celebrity blow jobs of the New York Disco scene. After being knocked out by their trip through time and space, they awake on the deck of the Black Bertha with the towering figure of 'One Ear' Jack looming above them and are quickly put to work on the most feared pirate vessel ever to stalk the stormy seas. Satin Hotpants and Polyester shirts prove impractical when attempting to slice the main brace.


1977 Sins of the Hoof

Director: Fritz Lung

Tumbling in the hay was never so lurid than in Sins of the Hoof, a carnal trip into the dirty world of international Dressage. The film bombed in Germany on it first release until a second distributor spliced in some Equestrian Erotica and re-released the movie as 'Pony Boner'


1978 My Boss, The Monkey

Director: Dale McTavish

When the eccentric billionaire CEO of Mega Corp Industries dies, leaving his entire estate to his beloved Monkey companion Mr. Itchy, hilarity ensues.


1982 Shaolin Monk Academy

Director: Ralph Wankelstein

Classic 80s screwball comedy, rudely spliced with no holds barred martial arts action as a gang of wacky criminals are offered the chance to avoid prison if they train as Shaolin Monks. Stand out moment? Steve Guttenberg sets himself on fire in a protest about separate dorms.


1971 Deep Nose

Director: Hal Manciano

Near unwatchable tastelessness from the spiteful mind of Grindhouse kingpin Hal Manciano. Goofball comedy and XXX action combine in a lurid tale of a woman born with a clitorus up her nose. Features, thankfully, the first and only double nasal penetration scene ever commited to celluloid. Possibly the most banned movie ever made, Deep Nose was briefly popular during the era of 70s Porno Chic but caused uproar among ear, nose and throat specialists.