What Films Have You Seen Recently?

[Frankie Teardrop]

UNCLE SAM – From Bill Lustig and Larry Cohen, ‘Uncle Sam’ is a kind of bastardised ‘Monkey’s Paw’ variant, one we’ve seen play out before in the likes of ‘Deathdream’ – young solider back from the war, sadly in a coffin, only, sadder still, he won’t stay in there. It’s really lumpy, but I liked its scattershot weirdness – a struggling pace fails to conceal oddities such as an Uncle Sam impersonator on stilts perving at someone’s window whilst trying to maintain balance, a suburban shoot-out finale involving canons and Isaac Hayes, and, best of all, an endless and pointless sack race – there you go, how many of those did Freddie f*cking Kruger ever win? I love the way it makes its political points by getting rid of any subtext whatsoever and just going for flat declarations – “war is bad, authority is bollocks, teachers are hypocritical dickheads etc etc etc”. And how about that ending? A direct homage to the final head-scratching frames of Fulci’s ‘City Of The Living Dead’ – Lustig, you’ve got quite a nerve. Well, don’t expect ‘Maniac’ or even ‘Maniac Cop’, but if you’re trawling the genre’s doldrum years (early / mid-nineties) you could do far worse.

THE INVISIBLE MANIAC – Quite literally mad scientist Kevin Dornwinkle escapes a locked ward and scores a gig as a physics teacher so he can perfect his invisibility serum and lech at his students. I should theoretically despise any variant of the ‘campus sex comedy’ thing that soiled the eighties from ‘Porky’s’ onwards, but ‘The Invisible Maniac’ is trash heaven. It’s one big throwaway gag, but there’s something squalid at its heart. All the men in it are awful, humiliated weirdoes; all the women are basically a load of tits. There’s nothing heavy about it on the surface – this is a film where someone is murdered by baguette, complete with comedy bulging throat prosthetic – but the mild sleaze feels nastier because it involves a pervy teacher and there’s just such a callousness about it all that somehow feels a bit thrilling. “F*ck reality, we’ve got a camera, a shower room and three or four days of catering budget – let’s go!” A questionable delight full of grubby quirks.

[MrBarlow]

The Killing Time. 1987.

Another Keifer Sutherland film from his early days, here he plays a psychopath who kills a cop, assumes his identity and travels to a small town to become the new deputy to Sheriff Joe Don Baker who is planning on retiring to Mexico and Beau Bridges is stepping up the ladder. Nothing complicated but there is a sting in the tail, Bridges is having a fling with a married woman Camelia Lynne and plan on killing her husband Wayne Rogers and framing the new deputy.

This is certainly not a big masterpiece, there is one or two bits that hype up the film with suspense but its not played out well, this is not the actors fault but seems like the director got a bit over excited at the moment then crashed and burned out dramatically and pretty much a bad predicted ending. This was entertaining but not one id rush back to rewatch any time soon.

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[MrBarlow]

Battle In Seattle. 2007.

Activist arrive in Seattle for a peace demonstration against a meeting that is to take place that deals with the World Oganisation Trade while other protesters start riots.

I don't usually watch films about demonstrations as the outcome can lead to mass riots and can be upsetting but this was actually enjoyable and seen through differen eyes. Woody Harrleson plays a police officer who is involved in keeping the pace on the street and looking forward to be a new dad until his wife is caught up unintentionally with the riots. Ray Liotta plays Seattle's Mayor who wants everything to go well with the talks and demonstrations. Martin Henderson, Andrew 3000, Michelle Rodriguez and Jennifer Carpenter lead a group of people for a peaceful demonstration and Connie Nielsen play a the tv reporter in the frontline. This can have one or two upsetting or distressing moments but nothing is over done, the acting is decent with no one trying to outshine anyone. Certainly worth a watch.

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[MrBarlow]

Mansion Of The Doomed. 1976.

Richard Basehart plays a mad scientist/doctor who fills his basement with people who's eyes he has taken so he can restore the sight of his daughter. Charles Band early low budget indie film isn't that bad, you got Stan Winston providing the make up effects which isn't too bad and you got Drago's trainer Michael Pitaki at the directors chair and a appearance by Lance Henriksen who becomes a unexpected victim to the mad doctor.

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(This went under the title Massacre Mansion)

[Demdike@Cult Labs]

Love Thy Neighbour (1973)

Hammer's movie spin-off of the British television sitcom. Starring Jack Smethurst as Eddie Booth and Kate Williams as wife Joan who live next door to Jamaican couple Bill and Barbie Reynolds (Rudolph Walker and Nina Baden-Semper). The ladies get on very nicely but Eddie and Bill hate each other. However when the two families get a chance to win some money in a 'Love Thy Neighbour' competition, they pretend to bury the hatchet. Meanwhile Eddie's mother (Patricia Hayes) and Bill's father (Charles Hyatt) arrive to visit their respective children.

Love Thy Neighbour has two major issues for me - I'm not even going to discuss the casual racism and bigotry every other word because far from being offensive after the first few lines of the script it merely becomes laughable and ridiculous - No, the two main issues i had were Jack Smethurst, the series lead had zero charisma or charm, he's no Reg Varney that's for sure, and remained fairly unlikable and annoying throughout.

Secondly the script simply wasn't funny bar the odd moment. Not at any stage did i laugh out loud, nor did i really smirk to myself much either.

What did work was the pleasant, almost touching way Hayes and Hyatt got on together. Seeing the sights of the capital and going on dates, it was a far cry from their offspring's continuous bickering and one-upmanship. Whilst the two wives basically kept the story ticking along. A story so slight it had to throw in strikes at the factory to get anywhere near it's run time of a mere 80 minutes. Again, there wasn't laugh to be heard.

In a way this was disappointing. I saw the first episode of the series a few months ago and thought it had potential - It must have been occasionally funny as it lasted eight series - but this film was a tired laugh free zone with a witless star, even if the Network Blu-ray looked lovely and the Hayes and Hyatt sightseeing trip along the Thames was like looking out of a window.

[MrBarlow]

Originally Posted by Demdike@Cult Labs

Love Thy Neighbour (1973)

Hammer's movie spin-off of the British television sitcom. Starring Jack Smethurst as Eddie Booth and Kate Williams as wife Joan who live next door to Jamaican couple Bill and Barbie Reynolds (Rudolph Walker and Nina Baden-Semper). The ladies get on very nicely but Eddie and Bill hate each other. However when the two families get a chance to win some money in a 'Love Thy Neighbour' competition, they pretend to bury the hatchet. Meanwhile Eddie's mother (Patricia Hayes) and Bill's father (Charles Hyatt) arrive to visit their respective children.

Love Thy Neighbour has two major issues for me - I'm not even going to discuss the casual racism and bigotry every other word because far from being offensive after the first few lines of the script it merely becomes laughable and ridiculous - No, the two main issues i had were Jack Smethurst, the series lead had zero charisma or charm, he's no Reg Varney that's for sure, and remained fairly unlikable and annoying throughout.

Secondly the script simply wasn't funny bar the odd moment. Not at any stage did i laugh out loud, nor did i really smirk to myself much either.

What did work was the pleasant, almost touching way Hayes and Hyatt got on together. Seeing the sights of the capital and going on dates, it was a far cry from their offspring's continuous bickering and one-upmanship. Whilst the two wives basically kept the story ticking along. A story so slight it had to throw in strikes at the factory to get anywhere near it's run time of a mere 80 minutes. Again, there wasn't laugh to be heard.

In a way this was disappointing. I saw the first episode of the series a few months ago and thought it had potential - It must have been occasionally funny as it lasted eight series - but this film was a tired laugh free zone with a witless star, even if the Network Blu-ray looked lovely and the Hayes and Hyatt sightseeing trip along the Thames was like looking out of a window.

It must be my corrupted mind that made me laugh at both the series and the film. Even when I saw the title Love Thy Neighbour I started laughing just thinking about someone telling Bill he will have his picture removed from a marmalade jar

[Demdike@Cult Labs]

Originally Posted by MrBarlow

It must be my corrupted mind that made me laugh at both the series and the film. Even when I saw the title Love Thy Neighbour I started laughing just thinking about someone telling Bill he will have his picture removed from a marmalade jar

There were some amusing lines of dialogue but the constant name calling between the two guys quickly grew tiresome. To me it was no different from films where every other word is f*ck in some form or another. It's like the writers (With the odd exception) can't come up with anything of quality for their characters to say so just have then swear profusely or in this case call each other racist slurs.

[Demoncrat]

Give me LYN's insipid bigotry any day after watching ...


The Outwaters (2022)

A group of friends travel to the desert to shoot a music video. What they find wants you to scream the L word (Ia bleedin' Ia my arse ) but just gave the demon a headache. Literally turns into a ribtickler in the final stretch. The beastie looked impressive (what I saw of it ) but this barely compensated. Recommended on an FF tip, this looked for all intense purposes a "real" film visually until that ending. Nice song though ....

[Demdike@Cult Labs]

Escape from Alcatraz (1979)

One of the seventies most potent film making duo's, director Don Siegel and star Clint Eastwood, come together for a final time in this tough and compelling account of the only successful escape from San Francisco's notorious island prison.

Despite me seeing this countless times over the years it has me enthralled each and every time. Siegel's direction is top notch with a surgeons attention to detail and Eastwood is perfect for the role of successful escapee Frank Morris. Patrick McGoohan has a scene stealing realistic - rather than the usual ultra sadistic or corrupt - support turn as the prison warden too, but it's not just the stars who make this so memorable.

The film's secondary characters are fully rounded and brilliantly realised. From the super cool 'English' (Paul Benjamin) to the tragic 'Doc' (Roberts Blossom) - who's hatchet to the fingers scene has haunted me since childhood.

I think this is one of the best movies of the 70's and the best prison movie to date. A gripper from first to last!

When you think of all the dross that has had a boutique release it's a crying shame that films such as this only have bare bones studio releases in HD. Still at least it's a nice transfer from Paramount.

[Justin101]

Another that’s been in the watch pile for an eternity. Awful cover on the UK blu as well, the new US 4k has the proper poster artwork on the front. I wonder if that has no special features either?