Classic Films You Love To Hate

[fuzzymctiger]

Originally Posted by bizarre_eye@Cult Labs

General rules that I've personally found to be useful as a guide to avoiding awful films:*

- Anything starring Leonardo DiCaprio in a leading role (dude should of quit after Basketball Diaries)
- Anything starring Tom Hanks in a leading role (The Green Mile is tolerable due to its supporting cast)
- Anything starring Shia LaBeouf in a leading, supporting, or cameo role
- Anything containing sparkling vampires
- Anything produced by Platinum Dunes
- Michael Bay films
- Anything produced or directed by the Wayans Brothers
- Films where the main character(s) has to learn a valuable lesson
- Films that rely on a cameo by an established actor for people to actual go and see it
- Films directed by people straight out of the music video industry
- Films with prominent product placements
- Films that star blue aliens told to the story of Disney's Pocahontas
- Films starring Nick Frost and Simon Pegg
- Films starring a talking animal
- Films starring Sarah Jessica Parker (also see point above)
- Films about sport
- Films where Danny Dyer speaks
- Anything that Adam Sandler is either in, has financed, or has touched in any slight way whatsoever
- Slumdog Millionaire
- 'Nu-Coen Brothers' Films
- 'Nu-Cronenberg' Films
- Bland remakes of classic films (extra hate added for those infused with bad CGI)
- Rom-coms
- Musicals that don't include either copious blood, nudity, or chickens
- Comedies starring Will Ferrell
- Dramas starring Will Ferrell
- Thrillers starring Will Ferrell
- Horrors starring Will Ferrell
- Sci-fi starring Will Ferrell
- Westerns starring Will Ferrell
- Documentaries starring Will Ferrell


* to be taken as (ever-so-slightly) tongue-in-cheek

Only thing I can disagree with is Leonardo DiCaprio, as I think he's quite a good actor

[Gojirosan]

Originally Posted by bizarre_eye@Cult Labs

- Comedies starring Will Ferrell
- Dramas starring Will Ferrell
- Thrillers starring Will Ferrell
- Horrors starring Will Ferrell
- Sci-fi starring Will Ferrell
- Westerns starring Will Ferrell
- Documentaries starring Will Ferrell

I can certainly agree with this part of the list!

[the blob]

Talladega Nights and Zoolander are hilarious though...

[Daemonia]

I'll probably get some flak, but who cares, here goes...

Blair Witch Project - this was just a bunch of incredibly stupid teens running around the woods at night with a camcorder. Boring, dull, tedious, sleep-inducing crap.

Anything with Hugh Grant in it. And I mean anything. Yes, even Lair of the White Worm. He's ****ing useless and just plays the same stuttering idiot in all of his films. You can barely call it acting.

Apocalypse Now - I've never been able to warm to this film at all and I've seen it about 5 times now in its various forms, hoping to eventually like it. But that never happens.

Anything by Roman Polanski. Because...well....y'know, he's a child rapist. I can't support a man like that. And I was surprised Hollywood graced him with an Oscar recently. I mean, c'mon, the man's vile. So he makes good films. I'm also sure Hitler was a good painter too, but I still wouldn't have any of his paintings in my house. Polanski said he couldn't face jail time because of the trauma of the concentration camps he went through. Well then, don't drug and rape kids and you won't have to. Simples.

Most films by David Lynch. I just find his work baffling and incoherent. I think most of the people who think they understand his films, don't really. I read lots of psycho-babble but very little that makes actual sense when people talk about his films. I think Eraserhead is a self-indulgent mess and I hate it.

Night of the Living Dead (1968) - Whilst I recognise it as a landmark film, I find it slow moving and a bit dull. I much prefer Savini's remake. So there. Ner.

Citizen Kane - Again, I recognise it as a landmark film, but it's over-long and deadly dull for the most part. I can't say I didn't enjoy it, I did. But I still think it's massively overrated.

Four Weddings and a Funeral - Not only for the nauseating presence of Hugh Grant, but also because it beat out Pulp Fiction at the awards ceremonies and because it kick-started a whole genre of Brit rom-coms which I hate with a vengeance.

I'll post more when they come to mind.

[mr 420]

Anything starring the human ameba that is Adam Sandler. How he has made so many films and money is beyond me and people seem to find him funny!?! Biting my own balls off is less painful than having to sit through one of his films.

[Crimson Blade]

Rom-coms. Especially American ones they churn out on a conveyor belt starring Sarah Jessica Parker or Jennifer 'the actress who plays the same character in every film' Aniston.

Overblown CGI-laden Hollywood films.
Nothing but disposable rubbish.

Oh, and anything starring the overrated Tom Cruise.

[oaxaca]

Films starring Leo di Caprio, Ben Affleck, Matt Damon, most (but certainly not all - e.g. I enjoyed Clooney-starring 2011 film The Descendants a lot) films post 1995 it seems The Matrix movies. Modern rom-coms (older ones like Roman Holiday & Sabrina I enjoy because they had charismatic actors like Bogart and Peck and decent, though often a little fantastic, storylines). oh yeah and CGI filled crap! Can't bring myself to see something like Avatar, for example. I have to say though I find Will Ferrell one of the least annoying of the latest generation of comic actors, in fact I find his humour apes that of the Dan Ackroyd/Bill Murray/Chevy Chase/Steve Martin (golden) era the most, particularly in Anchorman but in some of his other films too.

Oh as for David Lynch, I'm not one for all-out weirdness generally - I've heard this is a trait of his movies - and I've only seen one of his films, DUNE (the cast - everything - is near perfect), and its probably the greatest sci fi film I've ever seen, but I'm biased because I think the book is easily the greatest sci-fi novel I've ever read.

As for Polanski, I don't think that much publicised 'incident' in his private life (or his traumatic childhood) has any bearing on his output which for me is amongst the best, most original and most consistent of any director. But I guess I can see why that incident would for some taint their opinion against him

[Gojirosan]

Originally Posted by Daemonia

Blair Witch Project - this was just a bunch of incredibly stupid teens running around the woods at night with a camcorder. Boring, dull, tedious, sleep-inducing crap.

I fervently disagree with everything else you said (except Four Weddings And A Funeral - which I too hate, but not because it "cheated" Pulp Fiction out of anything. Pulp Fiction doesn't deserve any awards! A massively over-rated film that only just avoids a place in this thread) but I cannot agree with this enough. Not only is The Blair Witch Project utter rubbish and very annoying, but it gave license to anyone with a spare weekend and a camcorder to think they were film-makers and this - whilst lovely in theory - has given us plently of dross, not least of all the much abused "found footage" genre revival.

I hold The Blair Witch Project responsible for the bloody awful, even worse, Paranormal Activity films and other lazy "found footage" crap.

[Pete]

Originally Posted by Daemonia

I'll probably get some flak, but who cares, here goes...

Blair Witch Project - this was just a bunch of incredibly stupid teens running around the woods at night with a camcorder. Boring, dull, tedious, sleep-inducing crap.

Anything with Hugh Grant in it. And I mean anything. Yes, even Lair of the White Worm. He's ****ing useless and just plays the same stuttering idiot in all of his films. You can barely call it acting.

Apocalypse Now - I've never been able to warm to this film at all and I've seen it about 5 times now in its various forms, hoping to eventually like it. But that never happens.

Anything by Roman Polanski. Because...well....y'know, he's a child rapist. I can't support a man like that. And I was surprised Hollywood graced him with an Oscar recently. I mean, c'mon, the man's vile. So he makes good films. I'm also sure Hitler was a good painter too, but I still wouldn't have any of his paintings in my house. Polanski said he couldn't face jail time because of the trauma of the concentration camps he went through. Well then, don't drug and rape kids and you won't have to. Simples.
.

Night of the Living Dead (1968) - Whilst I recognise it as a landmark film, I find it slow moving and a bit dull. I much prefer Savini's remake. So there. Ner.


Four Weddings and a Funeral - Not only for the nauseating presence of Hugh Grant, but also because it beat out Pulp Fiction at the awards ceremonies and because it kick-started a whole genre of Brit rom-coms which I hate with a vengeance.

I'll post more when they come to mind.

All of the above

Also....ZOMBIE FLESH EATERS. Now don't get me wrong, I do like the film but I think it's way overrated. It's nowhere near Fulci's best work.

[Kyle]

Originally Posted by Daemonia

I'll probably get some flak, but who cares, here goes...


Apocalypse Now - I've never been able to warm to this film at all and I've seen it about 5 times now in its various forms, hoping to eventually like it. But that never happens.

Anything by Roman Polanski. Because...well....y'know, he's a child rapist. I can't support a man like that. And I was surprised Hollywood graced him with an Oscar recently. I mean, c'mon, the man's vile. So he makes good films. I'm also sure Hitler was a good painter too, but I still wouldn't have any of his paintings in my house. Polanski said he couldn't face jail time because of the trauma of the concentration camps he went through. Well then, don't drug and rape kids and you won't have to. Simples.



I'll post more when they come to mind.

agree with them completely for the same reasons.