What Films Have You Seen Recently?

[Demoncrat]

Originally Posted by MacBlayne

It drained the life and enthusiasm from me. It feels like a film that was made simply because they had to (probably because original director David R. Ellis died before making it). There's no passion from anyone. The lead actress mopes about and Sam Jackson practically leaves every scene yawning. When a film delivers a boring performance from Mr. "YES THEY DESERVE TO DIE AND I HOPE THEY BURN IN HELL!!!", you know the script is lacking something serious.

But it's the film's look that killed me. It's set in a post-economic crash world and the filmmakers think the way to convey that is by dirtying up some extras, put a few holes in walls and slap a sickly green-brown filter over every scene. Imagine green-brown for 90 minutes. Ugh!

And because the filmmakers saw District 13, they included some random moments of parkour - complete with ear-shatteringly crap dubstep. Wretched stuff.

Even the film's potential sleaze and violence is drab. The head explosions are nowhere as awesome as Scanners, Hellraiser 3 or Raiders of the Lost Ark. They're more like somebody popped some bubblegum. Even the sound effect sounded like a quick, wet fart.

Did you ever see the original anime? Its subject matter (such as underage rape) is likely to offend but it was a stylish, fast paced affair that allowed time for its characters to develop. Plus, there is an action sequence set in bathroom that is one of the best committed to film.

The live-action remake's equivalent is a boring, cover-shoot affair. No pizzazz or flair - just standard cover-shooting. The most exciting moment was when my cat walked across the screen. Honest to God, could they not have her shoot the urinals and use the water to slide across the room and gun down the baddies?

Seriously, Kite is shite.

Cough Spoiler much??
Was looking forward to this.

[Frankie Teardrop]

CARNAGE ROAD: THE LEGEND OF QUILTFACE - I sometimes ask myself what I really get out of watching these kind of films. By 'these kind of films' I mean movies which look like they've been dragged through dirt and left to fester in the depths of some cinematic septic tank before being translated into third generation camcorder footage. The lowest of the low, the most abject of the abject... the 'shot on video' faction, back when that term had a meaning, brought us some epic stylessness, and I guess that's what I'm looking for when I watch the likes of 'Quiltface'. Basically a slasher flick with an arch-dude who isn't afraid to present his supposedly 'actual' face as a rubbish special effect, 'Quiltface' offers nothing new, but it does hit enough of those dysfunctional highs to endear itself to me... these being, in this case, the male lead's increasingly hysterical performance, the fact that whoever made it obviously only had access to one death scene sound effect , the last minute swerve into 'buddies from 'Nam' territory, the killer's cool mask. All of which come wrapped in poorly shot and edited AV. A real charmer if you go for this kind of thing, which I do.

LAS VEGAS BLOODBATH - Despite the best efforts of Arrow, 88 Films and various other dedicated horror boutiques, some movies will NEVER EVER make it onto Blu-Ray. I think the world, and those movies themselves, are better off for this. Like 'Quiltface', LVB is a difficult to fathom oddity from the yesteryear of grotty SOV. Who makes stuff like this anymore? Who made it back then? For what reasons? We can all understand the fan-boy enthusiasm of a Nathan Schiff, but did anyone ever expect to make any money out of something like this? Certainly, you wouldn't use it as your Hollywood calling card. Anyway, needless to say, I love LVB. I love the way it sets up its stall with what feels like a ten minute static shot of a guy on the phone which is just SLIGHTLY lopsided. I love the way that, after a preamble involving a bit of HG Lewis type gore, we get to the real meat of the piece - an hour of seemingly improvised, verite style scenes of female wrestlers chatting in someone's front room. I guarantee that if by this point you resist the urge to turn off your player and reconfigure your copy of LVB into an ashtray, you'll be mesmerised as a reward. It gets better - LVB's slimy killer (who might have a mullet, can't remember), bursts into lady wrestler's hangout and rips the foetus out of someone's stomach. Cue a bit more gore before end. As numbing as it is enthralling, 'Las Vagas Bloodbath' is an indie-gutter masterpiece and deserves a blighted hall of fame all to itself.

[Demdike@Cult Labs]

Originally Posted by Frankie Teardrop

LAS VEGAS BLOODBATH -

When i read this title it was like a hammer blow to the stomach. One of the finest examples of Pendulum Pictures chiq.

I immediately leapt for my Decrepit Pit of Nightmares box set with the intention of watching one of them this evening.

*Nosferatu@Cult Labs - I wouldn't go near this sort of thing if i were you.

[MacBlayne]

Originally Posted by Demoncrat

Cough Spoiler much??
Was looking forward to this.

Sorry if I wrote any spoilers but I'm not sure what I spoilt.

[Make Them Die Slowly]

Originally Posted by Demdike@Cult Labs

When i read this title it was like a hammer blow to the stomach. One of the finest examples of Pendulum Pictures chiq.

I immediately leapt for my Decrepit Pit of Nightmares box set with the intention of watching one of them this evening.

*Nosferatu@Cult Labs - I wouldn't go near this sort of thing if i were you.

I have it unwatched too in a 6 film slasher set I picked up for the mind numbing excellence that is Blood Massacre.

[Frankie Teardrop]

Originally Posted by Make Them Die Slowly

I have it unwatched too in a 6 film slasher set I picked up for the mind numbing excellence that is Blood Massacre.

'Blood Massacre' is wicked, maybe DD's best after 'Nightbeast'. After you recommended it ages ago I got hold of that six disc set, which is of course where 'Las Vegas Bloodbath' hails from.

[Demdike@Cult Labs]

Originally Posted by Frankie Teardrop

'Blood Massacre' is wicked, maybe DD's best after 'Nightbeast'. After you recommended it ages ago I got hold of that six disc set, which is of course where 'Las Vegas Bloodbath' hails from.

Decrepit Pit of Nightmares is a 50 movie set.

As well as Las Vegas Bloodbath there are such classics as Before i Die, Blood Sucking Babes From Burbank, Catholic Ghoulgirls, Toe Tags (excellent) and Suburban Sasquatch.

I've watched all 50 over the years and there are some real goodies among them such as the aforementioned Toe Tags and also Terror Toons. Unfortunately the majority all blend into one maelstrom of zero budget hell.

[Nosferatu@Cult Labs]

Originally Posted by Demdike@Cult Labs

When i read this title it was like a hammer blow to the stomach. One of the finest examples of Pendulum Pictures chiq.

I immediately leapt for my Decrepit Pit of Nightmares box set with the intention of watching one of them this evening.

*Nosferatu@Cult Labs - I wouldn't go near this sort of thing if i were you.

Duly noted. However, morbid curiosity now makes it seem extremely interesting!

[Buboven]

Shogun Assassin

WOW

10/10

[Demoncrat]

Originally Posted by MacBlayne

Sorry if I wrote any spoilers but I'm not sure what I spoilt.

Fair enough. Just a wee word at the top will suffice....